Lean, Mean...Softserve Machine?

Two sixty-eight.

For the past two or three years I have been in a rut. On the high end of the rut is 270, the low end 260. I work out and diet and sweat and run away from ice cream, and I slowly and painful drop to 260. I relax, even a little, eat a second (or third or fourth) slice of pizza, break off half a cannoli (and then a quarter and then an eighth, before repeating the process with a second or third cannoli) and before I know it I am once again knocking on the door of 270.

I've been lifting (see "Pumping Iron -- The Musical") which, in addition to a constantly aching right shoulder, has given me a little of my musculature back, but the fact remains: some guys have a six-pack, but I've still got a pony keg.

I have to bite the bullet and go cardio. Walking is actually very effective for me. I walk 30 or more minutes a day, and the number on the digital scale starts to fall. Eliptical, treadmill and other gym machine cardio is good, but it bores me out of my freakin' mind. I like jumping rope -- and have a zillion different kinds -- so that's good. I love P90x, but can't find the DVDs. (They're somewhere, I know it.) I like working outside, and I have always been fond of good, old-fashioned, Marine Corps calisthenics. So I have a lot of options.

What I need is a plan.

Okay, then. Here's the plan that begins from this moment on:

• 30 min. morning roadwork (walk/run) or ropework AND/OR



• 30 min. lunchtime cardio (eliptical/class/etc.) AND/OR



• 30 min. evening walk/run/calistenics.

At minimum, I will do 30 min. of SOMETHING everyday. If I miss the morning, I shoot for lunch. If lunch doesn't materialize, then it has to happen when I get home. In short, I can't go to sleep until I've done my 30 min. NO EXCEPTIONS.

It is June 20, so I will shoot to weigh 250 (loss of 18 pounds) by August 30.

Motivational comments welcomed!

$500 for 5K

Okay, forget everything I said about bets being bad.

Bets, good.

My younger sister Rosina L. Hunt, Esq., a successful Rhode Island lawyer and ultracompetitive sibling like myself, has thrown down the gauntlet and challenged me to a race. In October, we are running in the Run for Bob in Franklin, Tenn., sponsored by the Hockamock YMCA.

Because she's a woman, she insisted I give her the same time differential that the Marine Corps gives women: three minutes. So if a man has to finish the race in 30 minutes, a woman has 33. To get a perfect score on the running portion of the fitness test, a man has to do three miles in 18 minutes, and a woman has to do it in 21:00. Can't argue with that. If it's okay with the Marine Corps, it's okay with me.

I've been trying to follow the Couch to 5K program at coolrunning.com. Its a three-day-a-week, walk/run program that is definitely doable. Not easy - not for me, anyway - but doable.

Weight is 261, mile time is 11:12 for one mile.

I'll keep you posted.